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Wedding Tips

February 3, 2020

4 Biggest Regrets That Brides Have About Their Wedding Day

 

Not a reader? Listen to the audio of this post below!

 

Regret is such a heavy thing. When people think of their wedding day, the last thing they want to be associated with it is regret.

 

I recently posted on my personal facebook page and asked people to share their biggest regret about their wedding day. It was SO insightful, but it was also extremely heartbreaking. As a wedding photographer, I work hard to make sure that my brides and grooms have the best day possible. I know the countless time that they have put into planning. There are HOURS spent on Pinterest stressing over color palettes, brides maids dresses, and decorations. It was heartbreaking to hear stories like I did on my Facebook post. I am by no means trying to freak you out (not doing a good job at that huh?). I actually believe that the best proactive step to avoiding regret is learning from other peoples mistakes. With that being said, I am going to share the top 4 regrets that I hear from brides over and over again!

 

Oh, btw, you can check out the comments on my post by clicking the link below if your curiosity is getting the best of you 😃
https://www.facebook.com/chris.cerna/posts/10157298491201768

 

1.Not Hiring A Videographer

 

This seems to be the BIGGEST regret that people have when it comes to their wedding! It was Lara an I’s for sure. When we looked at our budget that seemed like the obvious choice to pass on since we were already hiring an amazing photographer. If I could go back I honestly would have done a less extravagant meal and hired a pro to film our wedding. Video allows you to experience the romance of your wedding day that photos just don’t deliver. (Weird hearing this come from a wedding photographer right?)

 

Sound is a powerful stimulator of emotion. Hearing your wedding vows read out loud and watching that moment unfold is something that you can relive with your spouse on anniversaries . You can share those moments with your children! They will giggle and say “Ewwwwww“ as they laugh at mommy and daddy share a kiss.

 

Videographers who are experienced might seem pricey, but they are well worth it. Hiring a talented professional is going to ease your mind! I understand that everyone has different budgets.There are all sorts of videographers at different prices points. So how do you pick the right one? The most important thing you can do is to do your research! Find multiple professionals who are in your price range and view their work. Don’t just go off of 1 minute clips. Ask to see a full ceremony. If you are getting married indoors ask to see some indoor footage. Is the audio clear? Is their camera footage shakey? Look for someone who is consistent in the quality of their work!

 

2.Trying To Please Their Family

 

After you get engaged, you will be flooded with unsolicited advice from people who have gotten married before. Some of it will be good! Some of it would have been better left unsaid. It’s easy to brush off the pushy opinions of a co-worker or friend, but what about a close family member? This situation can be a little more difficult to handle. It can be especially tough when parents are offering opinions that seem more like mandates. Your Mom will most likely have the strongest opinions and you may even get into a few arguments about things that she believes are best, but remember this is YOUR BIG DAY….not hers.

 

You should not let the pressure of other peoples opinions dictate the decisions that you make.

 

If you want to have a first look but your parents think it goes against tradition….go with what you want and have a first look! Lara and I chose to not have a cake at our wedding because honestly we both just dont care for cake. We had an ice cream machine instead and it was AMAZING! We received pushback about it from her mother, but ultimately we made our choice and are glad we did it! You do you!

 

The last you want to do is make a decision to make someone else happy that leaves you unhappy.

 

3.Not Hiring An Experienced Photographer

 

I didn’t want to seem cliché and list this first…but honestly this is the biggest regret I hear time and time again from people. I can’t tell you how many times I have heard people mention that they had a family friend or uncle bob take photos at their wedding because it was free or cheap. They thought “Oh, they have a nice camera, as long as they get a few good photos that’s all that matters. It will save us a ton of money in the long run!”. This usually ends terribly for the couple and they have terrible photos from their wedding day!

 

I know it is tempting to save money by hiring someone who isn’t “charging an arm and a leg”, but spend the money on hiring a pro!

 

I realize that everyone has a budget to work with. I would advise you to prioritize a good photographer in that budget! Here are some comments from the post I mentioned earlier in regards to having regrets about their photographer.

-“Not hiring a photographer really got to me. We have some photos, but nothing where I can really look back and enjoy them.”

-“Skimping on a photographer!!!!! 26years later and I still regret this. 😩 Oh well, the day lives in our hearts. And we have a few photos.”

-“Skimping on the photography for sure!! We don’t have any pictures together beside during the ceremony.”

-“That we hired the photographer that we did. He missed a lot of important shots.”

 

Your wedding day will fly by so quickly! Hiring a photographer that has professional equipment, understands lighting, can direct people, and understands posing is so important. A good photographer is so much more than someone who has camera. Be sure to do your research when when it comes to who you hire, you are trusting this person with some of the most important memories of you life!

 

4.) Worrying About The Details

 

I get it, this is a huge moment in your life that you are spending lots of money on. The pressure is high to “wow” people with the venue, decorations, perfect weather, food, alcohol and the best party people have been to all year! With the bar set that high, who wouldn’t have a mild panic attack thinking about all of those things?

 

Do you know what worry stems from? It stems from uncertainty over actual or potential problems.

 

More often than thought, the things we worry about don’t end up actually happening. If there are real issues that are presenting themselves, worrying doesn’t actually help solve them at all.

 

I have been at weddings where nothing has gone wrong and I have witnessed things go terribly wrong at other weddings. The key factor in the day not being ruined is how the bride and groom reacted when something went wrong. You can plan ahead and try to make sure everything is perfect, but at the end of the day you are marrying your best friend! It’s ok if there is a delay in the starting of your ceremony music. The day isn’t ruined if you get a small smudge on your dress. Those rain clouds in the sky might pour down buckets or the might hold off! Guess what, worrying about it isn’t going to make the day any better. The best thing you can do is choose to put a smile on and live in the moment.

 

Your wedding is perfect regardless of whether certain details don’t work out the way you planned.

  1. Taylor

    February 4th, 2020 at 5:38 pm

    Awesome advice! Great read!!

  2. CHRIS CERNA

    February 7th, 2020 at 3:49 pm

    Thank you Taylor! Im glad you enjoyed reading this post 😄

  3. Katie

    February 4th, 2020 at 8:13 pm

    Chris, I love this post! It really is wise to learn from other’s mistakes – I hope this helps so many who are currently planning a wedding.

  4. CHRIS CERNA

    February 7th, 2020 at 3:50 pm

    Totally agree Katie! I love when people share the lessons they learn because it truly helps me save myself from a painful lesson!

  5. Brooke

    February 5th, 2020 at 1:53 am

    Yes to #2!! It annoys me to no end when family (mostly mom) tries to take over and make decisions. It’s as if they don’t care about the fact that it’s not all about them. Love this list!

  6. CHRIS CERNA

    February 7th, 2020 at 3:51 pm

    Tell me about it Brooke! I know the day can be hard on parents too, but that doesn’t mean they should live out the stress of the day by controlling the day!

  7. Rebekah Taylor

    February 6th, 2020 at 7:51 pm

    We hired a photographer that didn’t have much, if any, wedding experience. The photographer ended up accidentally deleting the pictures from the wedding, reformatting the card, and taking pictures over that! No pictures were able to be recovered! And what’s even worse was that my husband had a family member who had offered to come 2nd shoot, and I thought we would be fine with just one photographer. 😪 Wish I had known then what I know now!

  8. CHRIS CERNA

    February 7th, 2020 at 3:52 pm

    Oh Rebekah, I am so sorry to hear of your experience!

  9. Jen Shoemaker

    February 6th, 2020 at 10:37 pm

    Such a great post! I think you hit the nail on the head!

  10. CHRIS CERNA

    February 7th, 2020 at 3:53 pm

    Thanks Jen! 🔩🔨

  11. blak walters

    February 7th, 2020 at 12:35 am

    Lobe this & majorly agree about part talking about not doing everything to please your family!! Your wedding day should be about you, your fiancé, & what you both love!

  12. CHRIS CERNA

    February 7th, 2020 at 3:54 pm

    That was my favorite tip! It’s easy for brides to give in to those around them because they are so overwhelmed with decision fatigue.

  13. Katy

    February 8th, 2020 at 5:31 am

    This is such great advice! The thousand of little details that go into planning a wedding don’t really matter in the end. What matters is that you are marrying the person that you want to be with for the rest of your life. Enjoy it!

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